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I am feeling it this year. Feeling tired, feeling like my metabolism is crawling at a snails pace, feeling just plain old. I've peaked and it's all down hill from here. Thankfully I've got a family who loves me, despite my developing wrinkles and saggy back side. The youth lake trip was on the morning of my birthday and Ryder had been invited to a birthday party, so that left Maddox and I alone for a nice birthday brunch. He was the perfect gentleman and I quite enjoyed our time together. He was so sweet to save up his allowance and ask Kylie to take him to the store to pick out the perfect plant for me. Be still my heart. 

And then there's Ryder that decided he would rather spend his money on Pokemon cards, but he still wanted a picture with me. I'll take what I can get. 

We went to Joe's Farm Grill and shared pancakes the size of my head. And took awkward pictures sitting across from each other, as one does in a public place on their birthday. 

We were sure to stop by for a free drink at Dutch Bro's on the way home. That evening we went out with the Herrera's to dinner at Joe's BBQ and to the movies to see the new Mission Impossible. Jason surprised me and bought me an Apple Watch. It was Kylie's idea and they were so excited to give it to me and couldn't wait so they gave it to me the night before. It was the perfect birthday and helped soften the blow of growing old.

The last of the firsts

Most kids lose their first tooth around kindergarten. Ryder is in second grade. He has been so anxious to lose his first tooth, but for selfish reasons I was not. I was holding on to those last lingering signs of my last baby. Not ready to see that perfect little smile and those perfect little tiny teeth be replaced by big jagged monstrosities. Not ready to admit that my baby is finally growing up. The dentist had said that he was on track to lose his first tooth around Valentine's day. That was 6 months ago and every day since he has been wiggling his teeth and checking for any progress. He finally got his first loose tooth and as anxious as he was to lose it, he got cold feet when the moment of reckoning came and it was time to pull it out. It was hanging by a thread, but he was hysterical whenever Jason got close to his mouth. I was sure he was going to swallow it in his sleep if it didn't come out. He finally agreed to let Dad pull it. At this point everyone had gathered up in our room to cheer him on, but the attention was too much to handle and he made them leave. They all stood outside the door giving words of encouragement until the moment it was out and then they all came barging in ready to give him a hug. Some days I swear these kids will never learn to like each other, but moments like this reminded me that I don't need to worry. They really do love each other after all. And that was our last first lost tooth and now I'm going to go smother my face in his baby blankie and cry. 

Sometimes it's hard

The week before school started we got the email with the teacher assignments. Immediately every mom gets on their phones and starts group texts to see if their kids got the same teacher. One by one, every one of Ryder's friend's moms text with exclamation points that they got in the same class! And one by one every one of Maddox's friend's moms text back that they are in Ms Decarlo's class. And Maddox is not. Ms Decarlo is the one teacher he wanted and to have, and all of his friends were put together in the same class with the teacher he wanted. It was like a punch in the gut. It was more than he could handle. We were at Tyson and Dawn's for dinner with Todd and Mady when all the texts were coming in. We just excused ourselves to their den where I sat on the couch holding a brokenhearted boy who was crying so hard he was shaking as he soaked my shirt in his tears. Growing up we all experienced heart ache, but I can testify that no amount of pain and loneliness I felt growing up could even compare to the physical pain I felt in my heart for him. Making friends doesn't always come as easy for him and he has struggled the last few years with feeling like he has no friends. Of all the kids he was the one I was the most worried about this year. I knew I had to think of something to help, since home school was the only viable option in his mind. I said a quick prayer in my heart and the idea came to me to have a back to school party. I told him that he could invite all the boys from his class and it would be a good opportunity for him to meet new friends. It was literally divine inspiration. It helped get him out of his funk as he got excited to help plan the party and pass out invitations. The evening of the party came and our house was filled with the sweetest little 4th graders. They all wanted to be Maddox's friend. Several of the moms commented to me when they dropped their boys off that this was their first year at the school, or that their son was also struggling to make friends and this was the perfect way for them to connect. I was also able to exchange numbers with the moms to set up future play dates (or "hang outs" because 4th graders don't "play"). It was the beginning of some great new friendships. Maddox had told me earlier that he had prayed all summer long that he would be in the same class with his friends, and he didn't know why his prayer wasn't answered. I was able to look him in the eye and tell him without a doubt that his prayer had been answered. It wasn't answered in the way he wanted, but his Heavenly Father was aware of him and answered his prayer in the way that He knew was best. If he had been put with his other friends he would have missed out on this opportunity to grow and make so many new friends. He still reminds me every day that he doesn't like his teacher and wishes he had Ms Decarlo, but you can't win them all. At least for now he comes home happy, and for that I am so grateful. 

Apparently the bottle flip game is still king in the 4th grade

First Day

We blinked and summer was over. It was a good one, as summers always are. Jayden started 8th grade, his last year in middle school. 

Maddox is in 4th grade and Ryder is in 2nd. It's all going by way too fast.

Kylie started school a few weeks after the boys, but she spent one of those weeks doing training for her new job. We were all collectively excited for her to start her first job. Her $30/month allowance just wasn't cutting it and it's important for her to learn money management before she's on her own. She applied to a few places but nothing was working out. Her friend was able to get her an interview for a customer service job at a pest control company. Jason was sure to prep her well for her interview, interviewing is sort of his thing. She was over prepared, but that is always better than under prepared. She got the job and would come home with funny stories every day after training. Like the guy who offered her a bite of his sandwich. And a sip of his aloe water. There was also the poor wonky eye guy whose right eye would start wandering to the side whenever he talked to her. And the sweet old Jamaican man that greeted her every day with a big smile and friendly greeting. And there was the time that she farted, but she said it was a cute one so she wasn't mad about it. She just kept a straight face on the outside while on the inside her mind was going OH.MY.GOSH.I.JUST.FARTED.AT.WORK! She also was excited to tell us about "this thing that they call a bonus". She seriously kept us laughing with her stories every day. It's not the most exciting job, but she's doing well at it. Not only did she start her first job, but she also got her driver's license! Let me just tell you, nothing is more scary than sending your child out on the road by themselves for the first time. I was tracking her phone so hard. The first day she got her license she drove to work and when it was time to leave there was a huge monsoon storm. A policewoman was directing traffic around a fallen tree and Kylie was so confused by her gestures that she ended up just going straight towards the cop. As you can imagine, that did not go well. She got a pretty good talking to, but once she realized it was her first day on the road she lightened up and used it as a teaching moment instead. She hasn't had any problems since and there definitely are perks to having her drive. No more rock, paper, scissors at 11:30 pm on the weekends to decide who has to pick her up. 

The first day of school finally came for her. Not only did she start her first job, get her license, start school as an upperclassman and make the dance team, but she also started the cosmetology program. It's such an awesome opportunity to be able to enroll in the program her junior and senior year and graduate with her license. It will be so nice for her to be able to use this skill to put herself through school, and the best part is that instead of the usual $20,000 beauty school tuition we only have to pay $350 in supply fees. She has definitely grown up in a matter of months and has entered the adult world. It all hit her pretty hard that first day. She thought she would be able to come home and eat before she went to hair school, but her schedule got switched due to dance so she had to pick up another period. Her history class wasn't offered as a zero hour and she was told she would have to go to summer school. Dance tryouts were on her first day of training so she had to miss that and there was a lot of misunderstandings and emails back and forth about when she could do a make up tryout. Her 4th period class ends at 11:47 and she needs to be in her seat at hair school by 12:00 and it is 17 minutes away, and she can't ever be late. The class is 4 hours long with one break in between and she didn't bring any snacks or have any money. At this point the only thing she had all day was a smoothie. She gets home at 4:15 and has to eat really fast in order to leave by 4:35 to get to work. She doesn't get home from work until 8:20 then has to start homework. It was a lot and after coming home from work that first day she had an anxiety attack to the point that she couldn't breathe, it was scary. I don't blame her, it's a lot of pressure. She wanted to quit her job and quit the hair program and maybe even quit dance. It was hard to know how to handle the situation and especially hard to see her like that. Part of me wanted to let her quite everything and go back to her comfort zone, but I know that growth doesn't come by giving up. This was a good dose of real adulthood and if she can learn how to balance everything that is thrown at her while she's young, then she will be so much more prepared to face it when she's on her own. We met with the counselor and got her enrolled in an on-line class at school for zero hour for history. We talked to her 4th period seminary teacher and got permission for her to leave class 10 minutes early every day. We talked to the school and got permission for her to move her car to the seminary building after 3rd period. We got the dance thing figured out and after enrolling in a general dance class they were able to observe her and let her move up to the Synergy dance team after the first week of school. We made sure to pack her a big lunch and plenty of snacks. I started making dinner at 3:15 every day so that it can be ready by the time she comes home at 4:15. We talked to her work and were able to get her schedule reduced to 3 days a week instead of 5. And she was finally able to breathe. It is still a lot on her plate, but I am so proud of the way she has handled it and the way she has pushed through and not given up. She is so glad she didn't end up dropping out of the hair program. She absolutely loves it and has made some great friends already. They're only a month and a half into the program and already learning how to do color treatments! I can't wait for her to be able to do my hair! She did give me a proper blow out  and I must say I was impressed!

A summer full of family 

We somehow lucked out this summer to be with family almost every week. Between our Utah trip, my dad and sister coming for a week and half and then right after they left Troy and Brenton brought Jayden home (it was so kind of them to keep him for a few weeks AND drive him all the way home!) and they stayed for a few days. Shortly after they left we had convinced Todd and Mady to come down for a visit, then a few days after that school started. It was a whirlwind summer! We love having guests visit, and going to the lake is always a must. 

Every once in a while we luck out and see bald eagles

Nothing bonds a family like a game of king of the mountain

Sunset at the lake is my absolute favorite

When Todd and Mady came we took them tubing on the Salt River. We dropped them off then I waited at the end with the boys. I though they would have fun playing in the river, but they were not too happy that they couldn't float down too. They had more fun than they would like to admit while riding the current on their boogie boards and catching fish in Pringles cans.

Of course we had to take them to the lake too. Maddox has found the sweet spot and learned to surf without the rope. I would say he was pretty excited about that.

Same spot, same beauty, different night, different sunset. We love sharing our happy place with people we love!