Thursday, April 17, 2008

The Facts of Life

I had a lengthy discussion with my friends about teaching your kids the proper names to their body parts. We've always referred to them as "private parts" and left it at that, but they convinced me that it was vitally important that they know the proper names. I'm the first to admit that I have a hard time saying those words myself, I mean did the creaters of the English language use up all of the easy words like "arm, nose, ear..." before they got to the nitty gritty parts of the human body and were reduced to creating words that just give me the heebie jeebies every time I say them? Obviously I have my own issues to work out, so I guess that's all the more reason to get my kids more acquainted with those words so that they don't suffer from body-part-name-phobia the rest of their lives. So one night Jayden was climbing on the counter in the bathroom and smashed his little "private part". He immediately started crying and was very worried that "it's going to fall off and I have to buy a new one!" Since we were discussing that region anyways, I thought it was as good of a time as any to teach them the names, so I went for it and it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. Kylie was thrilled that she had a "China", and Jayden was too preoccupied with what store would carry a line of replacement body parts, that he really could care less what it was called. Oh well, atleast I can say I tried. Along the same lines, another friend and I had a conversation about how to answer certain questions on a child's level. One of those questions was in relation to tampons. I had always blown off that question when Kylie would ask what they were, but I had gathered my strength from the body parts conversation and decided to take the bull by the horns. I casually brought it up with Kylie while she was eating her after school snack. Yes, that probably isn't the best time to discuss topics related to "China's", but she took it well and didn't seem too traumatized. Her reaction: "Mom, don't you think this chip looks like a pirate ship?" Don't say I didn't try. (P.S. I did clear up the whole "China" thing in an effort to avoid an awkward situation at school when the teacher asks where China is located.)

17 comments:

Janessa said...

You crack me up! I think the chip comment was merely a diversion for her poor traumatized mind. Just kidding! I love that she's accepting of her "China". So, does she understand that you don't have to be chinese to have a china? Good luck to Jayden on finding a store that carries the right equipment:) Your kids are so adorable!

Jodee said...

I am dying laughing. That is so funny! I can just see you trying to discuss those words with your kids. I love that Jayden thought it would fall off. And Kylie and her China, too funny! I am sure you will be having many more discussions like that when the baby comes! That could get interesting with the "China" and all...

Chelsea said...

Oh my gosh, that is so true! WHY WHY WHY are they named those awful words when arm, nose, ear, leg, toe are SO SO much easier to roll off the tongue! WHy on earth!? I can't say the 'real names' either, and I think I told you once what my mom told us ours were called. EEEEEKKK! I'm still traumatized. I'm pretty sure no one else in this world was taught that one! China is hilarious! I can handle that.

Kathi said...

Crap, you mean I shouldn't be calling it thier "wee wee", ya that sounds pretty lame to hear(or read)myself say it.....I'm almost 29, I guess it is time to grow up and call things what they are. Pretty weak baby bump Jamie, could you eat a really big burrito or something before your next picture to make me feel better, my baby bumb probably weighs as much as you do :)

DAVE AND CANDACE BOLLARD said...

Wow!! You are brave. I've had the same conversation with friends but I just don't think it's necessary. I think I turned out ok and hopefully Courtney will too. Kudos to you for doing it!

Renae S. said...

thanks for the blog invite. I love it! I was JUST having this same conversation with some friends on Wed., so I loved this post. And, about the baby bump, I've gotta say, "Are you kidding me? There's no bump there at all!!" You look amazing to be 14 weeks, with a THIRD baby too! Amazing!

The Morris Fam said...

The "China" thing cracks me up. So apparently Kylie IS at the right age and Jayden still too young? You are one tiny skinny mama. What I want to know is why you don't sport bikinis every single day. I would if I had your skinny bod!

Angie Whitman said...

AHAHAHHAAAHAAA!!! Thank you once again for a good laugh! I love it. I can tell we have kids the same ages cause mine seem to be going through the same stages. I had a talk with Makenzie the other night about the proper way to "wipe" from front to back. So...then the next night she is giving Maddie the low-down. She says, "Maddie, you have to wipe from front to back or you can get an infection in your "little china" and then you might have to go to the hospital." Hmmmm...I got my point across, right?:)

Alisa Larson said...

That's so cute, and hey "china" is kinda a cute name for it! Although I know you're not into "naming" the region! :-)

Michelle Y. said...

Ok, your last comment about "where China is located" is the funniest thing I have ever heard in my life! I have major issues about that subject too. I've taken the classes, read the books, seen the professionals talk on TV and I know what parents are supposed to do but I really have issues with the "China word" too. I don't have as many issues about the "boy part" word, so I guess that is good since I have 3 boys. Anyways...my sister was just here for a week with her one year old daughter and can you imagine what my boys thought when they saw her get her diaper changed in my house full of 3 boys and one man?! :)Tanner was like, "Where does her pee come out? It's broken." Then my sister says, "She is a girl and girls have a "V"." My mom and I were there and I died that she taught my boys that word and my mom was like, "I would rather hear you sware then say that word." My mom really was kidding, but there is a little truth in all humor, so I guess that is where I get my "V" word issues from. Another thing...wait till you start nursing...my kids are so facinated with that :)

Melissa Stadler said...

Oh you are a smart mama to start talking about it now. I am the same way and I dread those real conversations. We just refer to it as the "wee wee" and call it good.
Hey - the tampon question is a whole new ball game. I love that she just went ahead and changed the subject. I love the sweet, innocence of kids.

Janessa said...

I love your P.S.! Good forsight on that one. :)

Marisa said...

That is too funny! I obviously have the same issues as you because I can't move beyond "private parts". I figure I'll be too mortified when one of my children yells (as my friend's son just did in Costco), 'Mommy, my p*#^* HURTS! (yep, can't even write it).... so good job getting beyond your issues :-)!

Nichols Family said...

Oh man! Once again I'm glad I only have boys to explain things to. Although they are a little concerned about why I don't have what they have. Yes and I agree, those REAL names FREAK me out!

Rohm Family said...

good for you jamie-love the china word :)

Heidi Ann said...

You are hilarious! I admit, I've wondered wether or not to teach them their anatomy but decided no way, call me weak but whatever. A REALLY cute post, I'm still laughing about China!

Kristin said...

I am so proud of you! Way to just do it. I must say that I think I would rather call it a 'china' than the real thing. Like I said before, we're just not going there yet, That is the last thing that I want Austin pointing out to people. Thanks for making me laugh again!